3 Month Update

Once again, I am late with this update!  I used to wonder how new moms were always so busy since the baby "sleeps all the time" - now I understand... Not only does my baby nap sparingly and erratically, but I spend that time worrying that he will wake up as I run from room to room doing bits and pieces of chores.   There are many days that I have not showered, so yeah, I get it.  I am also still job searching, but I will do a separate post about that.  

As far as his updates, I always go by weeks, so I consider 12 weeks = 3 months.  I did this for pregnancy as well.  I guess most people would go by calendar months, but by weeks, Carter turned 3 months on Tuesday!  He is such a funny little guy and the majority of my days spent with him are filled with laughter.  I call him "judgmental baby" because he has a stank look that he will give you if you're doing something he doesn't approve of.  He still has his fussy periods, but overall he is a sweet baby that has stolen my heart with no chance of getting it back.

Weight/Length: Will find out at his 4 months checkup, but he is at least 12 lbs.!

Clothing Size/Diaper Size: 3 month clothing (not for long!)/Size 2 diapers (note: I've learned that it's time to size up when he starts having blowouts, even if he's still in the size range of the smaller diaper, bigger size = greater absorbency)

Likes: Being outside, riding in the stroller, being held, bathtime, peeing during bathtime, Cloud B Sleep Sheep, kicking around on the changing table, watching Mommy and Daddy cook/clean/walk around, being talked to in a high pitched voice, Fisher Price Infant-to-Toddler rocker, being sung to, watching TV (ALL.DAY.LONG.) - he seriously can't get enough, watching me change or get dressed (pervert), taking naps on Mommy and Daddy's bed, pacifiers.  

Speaking of pacifiers, I've heard rave reviews about the Wubbanub.  It's basically a stuffed animal with the Soothie paci attached, so when it sits on the baby's chest, it won't fall out as easily and I won't be running to the rescue to put the paci back in during naps.  And, I mean, it's SO CUTE and that is the main reason that I buy things, let's be honest.  Fingers crossed that it works!

(Image: Source)

Hates: BOTTLES (whyyyy... seriously!?)

Likes/Hates: Riding in the carseat, tummy time

Milestones: Blowing raspberries, finding his feet (sort of) and... laughing!!!!

Mom Scares: None this month, thank God.  I have, however, had nightmares ever since he was born that I woke up to nurse him and took him back into our bed.  I wake up and feel around the bed for him and freak out.  I sometimes even wake up my husband where Carter is (this got old fast).  This all revolves around my fear of co-sleeping and crushing the baby.  Thankfully I've never actually slept walked him into our bed, but I have had these nightmares for 3 months!  

Happy 3 Months, Carter!

A Day in the Life of an 11 Week Old

I always enjoy reading "Day in the Life" posts, so I figured I'd finally write one since Carter is sort-of getting into a routine.  Here is a sample day...

6:30am: I am either jolted awake by baby cries from the nursery or my body naturally awakens before he starts stirring.  Either way, we're up for a feeding, diaper change, and clothing change from pajamas into a onesie.

7:00am: Carter sits in his rocker and we watch the Today Show while I pump and eat a quick breakfast (whole grain english muffin + peanut butter or jelly).

7:30am-12:00pm: Baby is BORED.  No more TV, time for something else. I typically lay him on my bed while I clean/work on my laptop, lay him on his playmat for tummytime, or feed/rock/cuddle/shush him until he stops crying.  Sometimes I shower if I'm lucky.

(he's judging you...)

12:00pm-12:45pm:  Dad is home for lunch!  We cook lunch and he plays with Carter for a few minutes and lets the dog out.

12:45pm-5:15pm: Baby is BORED AGAIN. More feedings and cuddling/rocking/shushing.  If all else fails, we take a walk outside.

5:15pm-6:00pm: Dad is home from work!  Carter gets his last feeding around 6:00pm and watches us cook dinner from his rocker that I drag into the kitchen.

6:30pm-8:00pm: Time to relax and spend time with Daddy before bed.

8:00pm... on the dot!: Bath + footed pajamas + bottle of pumped milk + swaddle + kisses + prayers from me that he will get a good night's rest = bedtime.

8:30pm-10:30pm: Usually a glass of wine and TV with the husband before we both pass out from exhaustion.

... and then the rest of the night is up in the air - he occasionally wakes up once to feed at either 1:30am or 4:30am, but often he doesn't wake at all and I wake up rested (with majorly sore boobs).  He's doing pretty amazing for being 11 weeks old.

Also, someone sent this link to me about Baby Sleeping Positions and I found it hilarious and so appropriate:

(Image: Source)

2 Month Update

Carter is two months old as of Tuesday!  He is so much fun now and is growing like a weed.  The past week or so has been lovely - he has started sleeping from 8:30pm-5:45am (9 hours!) and I miss him while he sleeps.  I never thought I would miss our late night/early morning nursing sessions, but I do.  I feel like he doesn't need me as much anymore and is growing so quickly!

He also spent an entire week at the beach and was such a good baby.  He can adapt to just about anything, though he hated the cold ocean water.  When his toes touched it, he stuck all his limbs out and screamed bloody murder.  Next time we will have to ease him into it.  Other than that, he either napped in his Boppy or looked at the waves from under a tent, several towels, and a blanket propped up as double protection from the sun (paranoid parents!).  It wore him out!

Weight/Length: 24"/11.2 lbs. [as of 7/16/2012]


Clothing Size/Diaper Size: A few 0-3 clothing items fit, but mainly 3 month now - which we have tons of! /Size 1 diapers all the way!

Likes: Being outside, riding in the carseat, riding in the stroller, being held, bathtime, peeing during bathtime, Cloud B Sleep Sheep, kicking around on the changing table, nursing, watching Mommy and Daddy cook/clean/walk around, being talked to in a high pitched voice, Fisher Price Infant-to-Toddler Rocker, watching TV

Hates: Being naked, napping

Likes/Hates: Pacifiers, napping, tummy time, Fisher Price My Little Snug-A-Bunny Swing

Milestones: Finding his hands (and sucking on his fist all day long!), blowing bubbles/drooling, wearing pants, going to the beach for the first time!

Mom Scares: I set Carter down for a nap in his Boppy Newborn Lounger on the couch and went into my room to quickly pack a few things for our beach trip when I heard him let out a cry.  I ran into the living room and from my angle I could only see the Boppy at first.  And he wasn't on it.  I panicked that he had fallen off of the couch and hit the coffee table somehow but as soon as I turned the corner I saw him facedown on the couch squirming.  He had rolled off, but was safely on the couch.  At ~1.5 months old he is already rolling off of things... crazy!  Mommy learned her lesson and won't be doing that again.

Happy 2 Months, Carter!

1 Month Update

Carter is one month old today!  Things have changed so much from the first few weeks.  After about the second week, he was capable of being awake and not crying, which was wonderful.  I have definitely gotten the hang of taking care of him during the day while my husband is gone during the workday, but the first few weeks were extremely trying... extremely!

Weight/Length: 9.2 lbs./22"

Clothing Size/Diaper Size: A few newborn clothing items fit, but mainly 0-3 month/Newborn diapers fit for about a week after birth but we quickly switched to Size 1 once he started leaking through everything (my boy has an abnormal amount of pee!)

Likes: Fisher Price My Little Snug-A-Bunny Swing (which he hated until now!), Boppy Newborn Lounger, being outside, riding in the carseat, riding in the stroller, being held (usually), bathtime (which he used to hate... until his umbilical cord stump fell off and we were able to submerge his lower half to keep him warm),  peeing during bathtime, Cloud B Sleep Sheep, kicking around on the changing table, nursing, screaming :)

Hates: SwaddleMes (which he used to love!), being naked.

(First few weeks)

Likes/Hates: Pacifiers, napping, tummy time.

Milestones: "Coo"-ing, smiling, flipping from stomach to back, sleeping through the night.

Note: Our new bedtime routine that has been working consists of a diaper change, bathtime, putting on PJs,  swaddling him in his SwaddleMe (the only time he is swaddled now), giving cuddles, putting down a heating pad to heat up his crib for a few minutes (then removing it before he is laid inside), turning on the Cloud B Sleep Sheep, and Dad giving him his only bottle of the day.  The bottle gives him about 3 ounces which helps him stay fuller than if I was just nursing him to sleep - I use pumped milk or milk that I have saved while nursing by using the Milk Saver (mentioned here).

Mom Scares: He stopped breathing in the middle of a crying fit and his limbs froze - his little face had a terrified look on it and I panicked.  I was ready to try all of my CPR tricks that I'd learned in our class, picked him up frantically, and - thank God - he started breathing again.  Talk about a scare...  Another one was when he was napping in his bassinet and I was in the bathroom and heard him screaming.  I ran out and he had lodged himself into the top of his bassinet and couldn't get out. He is normally swaddled in his bassinet, so now that I know he can get lodged, I don't let him sleep in it unswaddled.  We also bought a Pack 'n Play that he physically can't get lodged in that we use for naps.

Happy 1 Month, Carter!

Carter's Birth Story - Part IV

I couldn't do it anymore.  My BODY couldn't do it anymore.  It had been 22 hours.  My husband and I decided that we didn't want to endanger the baby - his heart rate continued to falter - and progress was not being made.  My water had already been broken and the baby needed to come out.  I was given a dose of the pain medicine Nubain through my IV, but it was too late.

I told the nurses to stop the Pitocin and to alert the Doctor to come to the hospital because I was going to have a C-section.  They asked if I was sure.  This possibility had always been in the back of my mind since my Mom had 2 C-sections.  I figured it was likely, and at that point, I just wanted the baby out safely.

The midwife was not supportive of my decision.  She started listing out the risks of the surgery, emphasizing the large scar that would result.  Who cares about a scar when you're in excruciating, awful pain?  I asked if the risks were common and she said yes.  I was scared, but so utterly miserable that I was willing to do whatever it took to be done.  I couldn't keep my eyes open due to the Nubain and I thought I was hallucinating.  Papers were shoved in front of me to sign.  I still am not sure what I signed, I just remember asking my husband "Is this okay?" 

As reality sunk in, I begged the nurses to let me take a break.  The medicine was making me so loopy that I wasn't sure of my decision anymore and wanted to sleep it off.  I wasn't allowed.  They said it would take about an hour for the doctor to get here, but it ended up being shorter.  I was told that my husband would be able to stay in the operating room if they were able to numb my lower half sufficiently.  If not, I would be put under, given a breathing tube, and my husband would have to wait outside.  

I was quickly wheeled away.  I felt like I was going to throw up - probably from all of the medication - and brought my bedpan with me.  It was all a blur after this.  I remember being whisked away and then my husband was no longer by my side.  I guess he was getting his scrubs on at this point.  The operating room was filled with people - they all seemed young which stood out to me.  I was still struggling to open my eyes.  I have never felt so tired.  They were pricking me with a piece of broken wood to determine if I could feel pain in my lower body - YES I COULD.  I answered most of their questions with my eyes closed.  The operating room was freezing cold and I was still shaking in pain.  

The anesthesiologist referred to me by name, which calmed me.  He walked me through each step.  At the last minute, one of the nurses commented "You're all baby!" and that made me feel good.  I was transferred to the operating table (and thought they were going to drop me), given oxygen, and then apparently given the medicine that put me to "sleep"  because everything went dark.  I had always been terrified of being put under, but this time I thought that if I died at least I wouldn't be in pain.  I'd told my husband previously that if it were ever necessary that he should save the baby over my own life.  Morbid, I know.

It seemed like only a second had passed before I woke up.  I thought there must have been a mistake and we didn't go through with the surgery, but soon the Doctor was in my face saying "Everything went well."  I had been in the recovery room for nearly an hour, little did I know.  I was eventually wheeled back to my room, with a stop by the nursery.  My Mom was outside looking in the window and my husband was inside.  He held the baby to the glass and I thought about how huge he was - 8 lbs. 1 oz.  How did that come out of me?!  No wonder I was in pain the last few weeks.  My Mom exclaimed "He's a ginger!", said hi to me, and then quickly left for her hotel room.  By this point, it was about midnight on Tuesday, May 15.  Carter had been born at 11:49pm.

Eventually, I was back in our birthing suite and the baby was placed in my arms.  I was still so exhausted and loopy that we didn't bond well.  He was screaming and crying and I tried to nurse him (unsuccessfully, I'm sure) and then he was taken to the nursery for the night so that I could sleep.  I had pictured our introduction going a lot differently, but that's okay.  

While the road to recovery wouldn't be easy, we were both healthy.  Our son was finally here.  

Carter's Birth Story - Part III

"I think I'm going to need an epidural.  I'm scared it will get worse."  

My pain level was starting to skyrocket and after 14 hours, my body was reaching a point of exhaustion.  I knew that it would be some time before the anesthesiologist would be able to come to my room, so I requested the epidural.  The doctor came much quicker than I anticipated.  He reminded me of the doctor from the movie Knocked Up (actor Ken Jeong) and for some weird reason this comforted me.

(Image: Source)

I remember asking him if I could use the restroom first and he said "you can do whatever you want!"  An odd response after I'd been practically chained to my bed for 14 hours.  When he brought in his huge cart full of supplies, I began to panic.  I remember thinking to myself that I could just tell him to cancel the epidural, that I would be okay.  But I was too embarrassed since he'd already made his way to my room. 

I was terrified, given that several of my friends had told me how excruciating an epidural was.  This was one of my greatest fears of the process.  The doctor asked my husband to pull up the hospital table to the side of the bed.  We placed a pillow on it and my husband put on a hospital mask.  I was told to lay over the pillow/table and not move.  At this point, I was in so much pain and full of fear that I was shaking and sobbing uncontrollably.  I kept telling my husband how scared I was.  I wanted it all to be over.

It hardly pinched.  My doctor was amazing.  I'm serious when I say that I felt a tiny needle prick when he injected the numbing medication but nothing else.  He told me I could yell or scream as long as I didn't move.  I didn't yell, scream, or move, just cried.  Afterwards, he repeatedly told me how well I had done.  The IV I'd gotten earlier hurt 10 times worse.  He told me I'd begin to feel relief within 10-20 minutes, and sure enough, my legs began to feel heavy shortly afterwards.  I was given Foley catheter since I wasn't allowed to get out of bed.  I remember thinking I would've been fine to walk to the restroom, but looking back, it's a good idea they wouldn't let me.

The epidural caused the baby's heartbeat to drop significantly.  They put me on an oxygen mask and we frantically watched the monitors.  I thought to myself, "This is my fault.  I wanted pain medication and now it's going to kill my baby."  Luckily, his heartbeat stabilized and all was well.  I could move my legs but felt hardly any pain.  I told my Mom that before the epidural, I didn't realize how much pain I was in.  After 14 hours, even excruciating pain begins to feel like the new normal.  I silently thanked myself for "giving in" and getting the epidural.

I continued to labor for several hours.  We increased the Pitocin again and again.  Finally medicated, I felt fine and told my husband that I could continue laboring this way forever.  The epidural was blissful... until things started taking a turn for the worse.

My cervix was checked once again.  The midwife "stretched" me to a 4.  A 4!?  After nearly an entire day of labor, I was only at a 4? My heart sank.  To make matters worse, the baby's head was very far down the birthing canal, but it was turned to the side.  My nurses placed me in a very uncomfortable face-down position with one of my arms bent back and the other near my head.  The positions were designed to bring the baby's head to a more favorable position for birth, but they were nearly unbearable.  I had been on oxygen for several hours by this point and instead of making me feel better, the mask seemed to suffocate me.  I panicked at one point, begging my Mom to bring my husband back into the room.  He had gone in the waiting room to eat dinner with my stepfather.

It was around this time that my epidural began to "wear off" on my left side.  I brought it up to the nurses several times and was given extra doses of pain medication to no avail.  I was scared.  At this point, I couldn't move my legs and my body was stuck in an uncomfortable position.  I couldn't go much longer.  When the anesthesiologist's assistant finally came in to check the epidural catheter in my back I was convulsing in pain, sobbing, hanging onto the rails of the hospital bed.  I kept apologizing to her for having to come back and fix my medication, but she said "You're suffering in silence, most people yell at us" - this made me feel slightly less like a wimp.  But nothing could take away the blinding pain that I felt...

(Carter's Birth Story - Part IV coming soon!)

Carter's Birth Story - Part II

Tuesday, May 16th:

I changed into my hospital gown and laid on the bed.  It felt strange being a patient as I had never been in the hospital for more than a checkup or minor sickness.  I didn't like the idea of having the attention on me.  Fortunately, my first nurse was amazing and helped me feel at ease.  I was surprised how quickly things happened from the moment we got checked in.

I was given an IV - my first - which pinched... hard.  My nurse kept telling me to breathe because I'd made sure to mention how terrified I was.  I told her I was afraid I'd panic and rip it out, so she probably thought I was some whackjob with a fear of needles.  I'm actually fine with needles, but the thought of something staying underneath my skin for several hours disturbed me.

My cervix was checked - each time was excruciating as my cervix was nearly unreachable and the nurse/midwife had to really dig.  Despite being 8 days past my due date, I was not dilated.  

I was given prostaglandin gel  - a substance that is designed to ripen or soften the cervix - through a tube onto my cervix and instructed to remain in bed for at least an hour.  I was hooked up to a fetal and contraction monitor and we watched both the baby's heartbeat and my contractions on the screen by my bed.  When the nurse explained how the contraction monitor worked, I realized all of the baby movements I had been feeling the past few weeks were actually mild contractions.  We noticed my contractions picking up and I thought to myself, "This is good.  The baby will come soon."  We tried to rest.

I was given a second round of prostaglandin gel a few hours later and again told to remain in bed for at least an hour.  The contractions began to get more regular and my excitement grew.  The contractions were painful, but I could handle it.  I always thought I had a high threshold for pain.  The contractions went on for several hours.

I was checked again - the pain was worse with this check as I was getting sore.  I squeezed my eyes shut to keep myself from crying until she was done.  No dilation.  My cervix was soft, but not dilated.  It wasn't working.  The doctor wanted to try Pitocin, but I asked if there was another option.  I still had hope that things could progress.  She said we could try Cytotec - a milder drug similar to Pitocin - in pill form. The nurse brought in half of a pill and I clearly remember her saying "You only get half - this stuff is potent."  

The contractions continued and increased in intensity.  At this point, my Mom had arrived from Northern Virginia and she was in the hospital room with us.  I had originally not wanted to have anyone but my husband in the room, but it was nice to have the company during this "downtime".  We talked through the contractions and for some, my husband and Mom had to remind me to breathe.  The nurse had told us that it would help with the pain and I had refused pain medicine at this point.  I went in open to the idea of pain medicine and knowing that I would accept an epidural if it got too unbearable.  At this point, I was uncomfortable, but I was fine.  The doctor seemed surprised that I was continuing on unmedicated after taking the drug.

I was checked again a few hours later.  Progress was minimal.  At this point, it was getting to be mid-morning and I was getting frustrated.  Why was my labor not progressing?  Was something wrong?  Should I have waited to schedule the induction?  

Defeated, we began Pitocin.  At some point, the midwive broke my water.  I told her I had thought it would feel good and it ended up feeling like I'd peed myself, but not the release of pressure that I'd anticipated.  I didn't get a good look, but it seemed like much less fluid than I'd anticipated.  They changed the pad that was laying underneath me.  She said the fluid was good and clear, which meant it was free of meconium.    How could this be?  I'd figured meconium was inevitable given that I was 8 days past my due date.  The contractions once again increased in intensity.  I managed the pain for another several hours. We continued to increase the Pitocin dosage and I became more uncomfortable. I kept checking the clock but the hours seemed to run together.  It had been 14 hours of unmedicated, induced labor by this point...

(Carter's Birth Story - Part III coming soon!)

Carter's Birth Story - Part I

Monday, May 14th:

My induction was scheduled for midnight.  The days leading up to it, I was so nervous and excited that I couldn't get anything done.  I ended up going on an interview that afternoon but pretty much blew it because I was so distracted - not to mention, uncomfortable and overcome with hot flashes - to perform.  But I didn't care because we were finally going to meet our baby!  The tiny baby that I had been growing in my belly for 10 whole months was finally ready to come into the world.  I had pictured his sweet face in my mind and dreamt about him for so, so long - I was ready.

That day, I finished the last check of the hospital bags and waited anxiously for my husband to get home from work.  We tried to sleep for a few hours but it wasn't happening.  We watched TV in bed and talked.  I took another shower, my second of the day, determined to look nice for the hospital.  I didn't even end up putting my makeup on - I told myself I'd put it on when we arrived.  My excitement was quickly turning into nervousness as I had skipped the Childbirth classes and had little idea of what to expect. 

We headed to the hospital at about 11:30pm and arrived just before 12am.  We were told to check in a few minutes after 12am for insurance purposes.  We sat laughing in the car, stuffing our faces with a carton of mixed berries we'd bought earlier since I wouldn't be able to eat for many, many hours.  We took a video of ourselves on my iPhone to send to my sisters.  This would be our last time together as a family of two.  

We had to use the nighttime entrance at the Birthplace and the sign said "push the green button and state your name and purpose".  I couldn't find a green button, so I pushed the only button I saw, but felt too silly saying my name and purpose, so I was silent.  Luckily, they still let my creeper self in the door - there were cameras and my pregnant belly must have given me a few ounces of credibility.  When we arrived, they had been expecting me.  They greeted me by name, and showed us to our room, which was right next to the nurse's station.  All of the rooms in the birthing facility are private, so ours had ample space, a couch with a pull-out bed, TV, mini-fridge, and bathroom, complete with jet tub.  I made note of the various pieces of equipment and wondered how they would be used in the coming hours.  My husband took several trips to the car to bring in all of our stuff while I changed into the hospital gown they had handed me.

I had a feeling my labor experience would be short... 

(Carter's Birth Story - Part II coming soon!)

Carter James

Welcome to the world, Carter James!

Born on May 15, 2012 at 11:49pm, weighing 8 lbs. 1 oz. and measuring 21" long.

We love you so much.

(Birth story to follow...)